Favorite Song

Imagine a poisonous melody
That’s stuck inside your head 
And no matter what you seem to do
It’s a tune you can’t forget
But replace it with a feeling
Still on loop it will never end
Like fingertips against the skin
You will never touch again

Relentless

I will love the same way I loved before 
I will love someone even if I’m unsure 
I will love even when my heart becomes sore 
I will love until life lets me love no more

Letters To Him #2

I still can’t believe the levels of absolute sorrow you built for me, slowly pushing me into insanity. You absolutely crushed me, destroyed every broken piece of me until you were satisfied enough to walk away. I was too soft between your rough fingers, begging you to hold me gentle, you ignored all of my pleads. I begged and groveled at your feet for forgiveness for mistakes that I now realize I was never at fault for. All I desired was acceptance but you made sure to give me nothing but denial.

Letters To Him #1

I’m learning the true meaning of vulnerability. I am learning what it means to be open, fully and completely naked in my emotions no matter the consequences. I tend to close myself off after being hurt, or after learning that I can’t trust someone. And while that might be healthy in some ways, I am learning that it is okay to express you are hurt. For a full year I slowly became desensitized, incapable of feeling anything. I felt I never had a place to be open with you, and I really didn’t. Today I want you to know that the way I allowed myself to hurt in your presence was unacceptable. I will never allow self inflicted torture by “staying” ever again. Never again.

A Moon Amongst Others

I was always intrigued by the mere thought of you. Walking within the thick of a crowd, the long anticipated moment would finally arrive as your arms embraced me. I gleamed as if I were a child meeting their hero, nothing but admiration in my eyes and hoping to spend whatever time I had occupying your presence. A nervous-wreck, it took everything for me to balance the excitement that was slipping from the words I somehow managed to string into sentences. Those moments are lost now.