I used to pity you, and all that you had gone through. Every action that had led to the scars on your heart, all the wrong you did not deserve. That is until I discovered the vengeance you seek in those you find unworthy. What defines worth, my dear? To you, the expectations on value and respect are never held to your own doing. So what defines worth? Innocent souls trip on mistakes in your path and you condemn them for life. What defines worth? You do realize that this pattern of defining another’s worth, to you, is a viscous cycle of revenge, right?
You will never find happiness and peace while battling a non-existent war. Look around, my dear, for you have wounded those around you who have had nothing but love for you. Hearts that have been misplaced due to your lack of empathy and self serving actions. I hope you finally get what you are looking for, however, I really hope you get what you deserve.
I was always intrigued by the mere thought of you. Walking within the thick of a crowd, the long anticipated moment would finally arrive as your arms embraced me. I gleamed as if I were a child meeting their hero, nothing but admiration in my eyes and hoping to spend whatever time I had occupying your presence. A nervous-wreck, it took everything for me to balance the excitement that was slipping from the words I somehow managed to string into sentences. Those moments are lost now.
If the moon and the stars
Disappeared for a night
I’d find peace in the sun
That shines bright in your eyes
A night full of cries and tired eyes
As the moon decidedly falls
The sun will rise and you will find
A new day within the same walls
It wasn’t until I could see the moon rise that I decided to make my way outside to the wooden swing that gently swayed in the wind. After navigating through the dark, I sat down and felt the soft breeze that leaked through the forest behind me gently touch the parts of me that were uncovered. I tried everything I could to organize my thoughts, slow my breathing, and find some sort of peace in the chaos that wrecked my mind. Unfortunately, this type of madness stems from the depths of wounds even I wasn’t aware existed.