All of the little details and emotions that flood my mind convince me you are a demon most nights, but not tonight. Tonight I realized you aren’t a demon. I realized it is all due to the fact that you were truly my hero. I worshipped you.
I adored you and looked up to you like you were the greatest thing to have ever graced the ground I walked on. I wanted everything and anything good to make its way into your life and paint you in shades of happiness.
But you had other plans, as you reached right into the parts of me that lay void and filled them with warmth right before ripping it all right from my chest. You wrapped me in a facade of energy that felt safe and loving and infinite. I desperately fell for it all, tripping into an inevitable fall that would invariably wound me. Cutting into me deeper each time with evil precision, I couldn’t take it.
I had to go, I had to leave, it was torture.
His eyes fell in deep shades of blue
And I’m not sure if he knew
But just like the ocean deep
Everyone stares in the
Reflection of the surface
But the depth and soulful worth
Is often left undiscovered
I could hate you
And blame you
And shame you for days
But that pain
When I don’t let you stay
I used to pity you, and all that you had gone through. Every action that had led to the scars on your heart, all the wrong you did not deserve. That is until I discovered the vengeance you seek in those you find unworthy. What defines worth, my dear? To you, the expectations on value and respect are never held to your own doing. So what defines worth? Innocent souls trip on mistakes in your path and you condemn them for life. What defines worth? You do realize that this pattern of defining another’s worth, to you, is a viscous cycle of revenge, right?
You will never find happiness and peace while battling a non-existent war. Look around, my dear, for you have wounded those around you who have had nothing but love for you. Hearts that have been misplaced due to your lack of empathy and self serving actions. I hope you finally get what you are looking for, however, I really hope you get what you deserve.
I once was an open sky
But you complained of no domain
So I then became a storm
To which you scorned my heavy rains
I fell down into a pond
For you to find all but arcane
So I grew into a river
Hoping to flow into your veins
My current brought me far
But see by then it was too late
You seem to love the clouds
I guess my sky wasn’t that great
I will love the same way I loved before
I will love someone even if I’m unsure
I will love even when my heart becomes sore
I will love until life lets me love no more
I still can’t believe the levels of absolute sorrow you built for me, slowly pushing me into insanity. You absolutely crushed me, destroyed every broken piece of me until you were satisfied enough to walk away. I was too soft between your rough fingers, begging you to hold me gentle, you ignored all of my pleads. I begged and groveled at your feet for forgiveness for mistakes that I now realize I was never at fault for. All I desired was acceptance but you made sure to give me nothing but denial.
A night full of cries and tired eyes
As the moon decidedly falls
The sun will rise and you will find
A new day within the same walls
Dripping in sin
Cold with a grin
She’s begging to touch
But you never give in
Only for fun
A dangerous game
You have now just begun
Take one more step
Don’t hold your breath
There’s rapture inside
But it all ends in death
Not a friend nor a foe
Right or wrong? Neither knows
Fake a truce just to push away hate
Leave me hiding in fear
Can’t trust you or my tears
After waving your white flag too late